This is a picture of me trying to scrub the kitchen floor. Froggy has been a little clingy. And when I say clingy, I mean "hopping on my back like a little tree frog" or "riding my leg" as I walk through the house 'clingy'. She NEEDS love. I think she's actually licking my back in this photo.
I believe her new insecurity is a result of teething and realizing she and I are not actually the same person. If I leave the room for two seconds to use the restroom or put laundry away, Froggy stands at the baby gate screaming while huge tears stream down her face. And she's just recently started crying "Maaammmaaaa! Maaaaaamaaaa!" like I just dropped her off at baby boarding school or told her that "we should spend some time apart and that I'd like to see other babies." It breaks my heart because she is so sincere and I see how devastating even a little distance is for her.
I shower with the door open, curtain open, playing peek-a-boo between rinses and singing "Old MacDonald" at the top of my lungs, if only to stave off the crying for a three minute shower. I'm not even the type of person who enjoys solitude, but today as I sneaked into the bathroom, two cats ran in with me, and then the dog, followed by a baby. I looked down at them like, "this must be love." There are just moments when I really do enjoy solitude and the bathroom is one of those moments.
Froggy is IN LOVE with Froggydadda and I. After dinner tonight, while taking her out of the highchair, she hugged me with fierce loyalty and then whispered, "dadda, dadda, dadda." I laughed because it was like she was telling me, "I'm really thinking of dadda when I hug you."
On Friday, Froggy and I fly to Iowa for a week with family. I hate to take her from her Dadda, but hope the lure of my baby-crazed family and Ruby the dog, will be enough to keep her satisfied.
Sometimes the love between parent and child is so powerful, it's daunting. I remember in first grade sobbing, "I want my mommy!" And nothing could have appeased me. I wanted my mommy. Case closed. And when Froggy screams "Maaaaammmmmma" every time I stray five feet from her, I understand. On one hand I feel like a Siamese twin desperately trying to live a separate life from a person with whom I share a liver and spleen, and finding it just impossible to do so. And on the other hand, I feel...completely loved.